James Bond Spectre Hits theaters November 6th!


James Bond Spectre Hits theaters November 6th! To say I am excited would be an understatement. It has been three long years since the release of the brilliant Skyfall. Bond fans have waited long  enough. It is time for a new James Bond movie. This November 6th Spectre hits theaters. This is the film’s final trailer before the movie comes out.

I am not sure if Idris Elba will play the next James Bond but if he does he will have an instant fan over here. In the meantime Craig is doing a great job. I am not one for watching trailers of films that I am excited about because I don’t want any spoilers. That said this is the last trailer before the movie comes out and it is well worth it. There are no spoilers to worry about.

Love is Costly Emotionally & Mentally. What Are You Willing to pay?

Whoever said Love don’t cost a thing told a bigger lie than when Bush said read my lips “No new taxes.” Love is expensive. Very expensive. It can be monetary, emotional, mental or even physical at times. Is it worth it? Well love can be wonderful. Love can be tragic. What becomes of love is up to you and your partner. Love takes sacrifice but it should not take more than you feel you are getting back in benefits. That is not healthy. So here are some things that you should not be doing for the sake love.

[I] Will sex for love

Repeat after me; Love is love, and sex is sex. Guys get this at a very young age. Women seem to not get this fact very often or at all in some cases. At times women feel the need to have sex as an extension of love. Listen to me, don’t do this! It is a very big mistake. Its very critical you don’t do this when you are starting to go out with someone. Sex does not strengthen a relationship if you have problems unless that was the problem in the first place. Most importantly you can’t mistake sex for love.

[II] Logically illogical

A white lie is like a white flag going up. That person has surrendered. They will no longer try. What have they given up on? Trying, that’s right; they have realized that they don’t have to be a genuine person anymore. Don’t put logic to the back of your mind people. If someone is able to lie to you over some nonsense then what happens with the big stuff. STD’s, cheating, money, life plans and love. That’s right they will lie about those too.

[III] Disappearing Act

Tell me if this sounds familiar. Your friend starts dating someone who is great but you don’t see them anymore. I don’t mean you go from girls/guys night out to only events. I mean you don’t see this person anymore at all. They don’t show up to the bar, Social Media meet ups or any of the things they use to like. Did they have high goals and for the most part were on track to meet them? Does it seem like they abandon those plans? Well guess what? This happens all the time. People lose who they are when they get infatuated with someone they date. You should never lose who you are in a relationship. If you do not keep your identity what are you brining to the table? That’s right nothing. No one wants to be with a person that has no worth. Make time for the other person but don’t follow them like a lost puppy.

[IV] Set guidelines and rules

Look if someone says they love you and you have not had a talk about being in a relationship; chances are they never will be in a relationship with you. Why? Most likely you are already sleeping with them and are committed to them because they used the words “I love you.” Newsflash, they’re not committed to you in anyway shape or form. Until you have a title other than friend. That will be what others know you as and what your non committed partner sees you as. You have to set guidelines as to what you will accept from a person. If you are alright and can justify to yourself that being friends with benefits to someone you love is acceptable then so be it. Most people cannot. So set some ground rules that can not be crossed. These rules should be used as a guideline foe how you live your life. They’re not meant to keep you or your partner in check.

[V] Why keep a penny with a hole in it

Integrity is one of the few thing you can’t buy no matter how rich you are. If that is the case why would you keep someone under the illusion that they still own such a priceless commodity. If someone cheats on you don’t give a 2nd chance to them. Why? Well catching someone who is cheating means you caught them that one time out of god knows how many other times. A person does not just lie once. One lie has to cover another lie and another lie. You are worth more than that. Don’t sell yourself short to people that are really not worth the time, effort, or love.

Dating Myths & Facts


There are a lot dating myths out there. Some are fact some are not so much. Here is the low down.

Myth: If he calls right away, he’s a clingy loser.
That is not true. In fact he just likes you and is eager to spend more time with you. He is also able to express that with words instead of playing games.

Myth: If you meet the family than you should shop for rings.
That is a no. You need to slow down. It’s a meeting and nothing more.

Myth: If he doesn’t try to have sex with you right away that means he thinks you have long-term potential.
No so fast, maybe he is already sleeping with someone else or has classified you as platonic. Then again he may really respect you and want to wait. Point is there is no way of knowing.

Myth: If his friends like you, you’re in like Flynn
His friends may be thinking about that little thing you do with your tongue. Truth is guys gossip more than women when it comes to talking about their exploits. If his friends like you that does get your foot in the door but it does not give you a place to stay.

Myth: You met him in church, so he has to good man.
Snap out of it. This is pure fiction at least myths are based on some fact. Good men are everywhere. Church is the center of everything for some people. For those people Church is a deal breaker. If this person is you than church is the only place you will find a man because that is the only place you feel one is worthy of your heart and the only place you want to look for one.

Is the Relationship all in Your Head?


Don’t assume that they want anything more than friendship with the occasional moment of weakness booty call or convenience sex. If you have made it crystal clear that you want a future with them but all you get is the run around or change of subject when you try to discus it with them. It’s a given that the two of you will not be getting married anytime soon. You’ll be lucky to have a firm commitment of exclusivity out of them. So if it seems that you are the only one supporting the relationship maybe that is because you’re the only one who actually wants to be in it. I’ve learned a few things about the dynamics of relationship building. There are three basic rules to remember when it comes to relationships. These three universal rules are a constant in every relationship. If it is not in yours; you need to revisit the definition of your relationship.

  1. Your sense of urgency to honor your partner’s wishes must be reciprocated.
  2. When building a relationship from the ground up the key is to assume nothing.
  3. If someone you care about hasn’t told you or more importantly shown you that they too care about you beyond friendship, then you might want to reconsider your relationship.

Forcing someone to be in a relationship can only lead to total disaster. I know its hard to not express your feelings when you care for someone but take a step back. Some people don’t even realize when they’re forcing the issue. I’m here to help you see if you are one of the people forcing the issue of love. Think about these signs to make sure that you’re not forcing your love on someone who has no interest in love. These signs will also help you see if you’re forcing a relationship that doesn’t exist anywhere but in your head.


You are the Event Planner
Every date that you have been on and every activity the two of you have done; so far has been your idea. You are the one that makes all the arrangements. Truth be told the other person rarely accept your invitations anyway. When they do decline your invitation they never make the follow up arrangements. If someone doesn’t care enough to make time to see you then don’t force the issue.

You’ve become Dr. Phil
One of the clear signs of an unhealthy relationship is when you become the shrink. At that point it means that you are constantly over thinking. If you’re always trying to read how the other person feels then either they don’t care or don’t want to hurt your feelings. Either way, don’t make up feelings for how you think they might actually feel because those feeling might not exist.

There’s nothing in the calendar
You’ve suggested title exchanges. You’ve mentioned being committed to each. The only response you get from them is nothing more than a blank stare. They never mention a future with you because they have no thoughts of a future with you. As adults we know that relationships call for some serious conversations. If they are always changing the subject when you’re trying to talk about how to make your relationship better or any serious topic than you might want to think about the validly of the relationship.


Remember me?
If you had your way than the two of you would talk throughout day. Unfortunately it’s not up to you. So instead the two of you are speaking once or twice a week at most. Sometimes communication lapses longer than that. If you’re the only one sending goodnight text, good morning text or constantly calling to say hello because you really just missed the sound of their voice. Fall back, meaning you’re doing too much and forcing something that is not really there. There are 24 hours in a day and a text takes less than a few seconds. If someone can’t take the few moments it takes to speak to you than they just don’t want to especially if they find the time to update Facebook. So stop initiating texts or calls.

Giver never a receiver
If you are the one always giving love and never receiving it. Get a clue. They’re not in to you.

The Cost of Friends With Benefits


I thought I’d speak on the pros and cons of the Friends With Benefits arrangement. Two movies come to mind when I think about this subject. “No Strings Attached,” starring Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher. As well as the Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis movie “Friends With Benefits.”

For some it works and works very well. Why so well? Uncommitted sex is just that, a commitment to nothing more than sex. In most cases these situations are transparent. Nobody’s trying to be anything they’re not or make promises they don’t intend to keep; it’s all just about having fun. You should have some strict boundary: no sleepovers, insists on no cuddling and no morning-after breakfasts. You don’t want to make things messy.

That is the problem with “Friends with Benefits” sometimes, ok not sometimes; it always gets messy. “I’ve been in a few of these situations and, basically, they work until they don’t.” When you’re in crisis or in vulnerable state there is something oddly comforting about the idea of someone who you are emotionally in no danger of getting attached to.

There are however risk. Here are the signs that you are getting emotionally attached to your friend. If you see these signs trust me it will not work out. So you should seriously consider transitioning to “friends who do not sleep together” .

  • If at anytime you find yourself thinking “I actually liked him or her more than…”
  • You get invited out for an evening that seems a lot like a date.
    • You think why aren’t we dating?

As with any human relationship, there are often ulterior motives. So let’s say you didn’t listen to me and you ignored my suggestion to pull out at the first sign of attachment. You may end up being the one they are forced to stop hooking up with because it has become really dramatic or awkward. Worse you could end up sending out mixed signals. They may think that they are doing something casual but it doesn’t seem casual in your mind. If you are not careful and real with how you feel you will be caught off-guard.

The reverse is also true. You have to be very skeptical when somebody tells you that it’s OK with them. Why? Well because most of the time it’s not OK with them. They may be in such desperation to have a relationship with you that the option for FWB was the only thing they could think of as a way to keep you interested with them. The last thing you want is a casual pretense.

The sad this is that is a common experience with these kind of arragments. A friend of my mine said “It was fun at first, but of course my emotions got jerked around which was totally my fault,” she said. “Why I thought something serious would evolve still makes no sense at all”

We all know the high stakes that goes with friends with benefits. After all this person is your friend. Not just a booty call. So, why do we do it? Well as a guy I can tell you the idea of sex without consequences is one of the most alluring things on the planet. The mixture of freedom and dependability that comes with a Friend with benefits is unlike any other relationship that I can think of or experienced. You get to not commit but still kinda be committed. Non-committal commitment, if you will.

  • Sex Will Change Your Friendship

Adding sex to any relationship especially just a casual one changes it. So if you’re having intercourse with a friend it will without a doubt change the way that relationship will proceed. It’s possible that the two of you will remain friends, but you’ll never be as close as you were before you crossed that physical line. Besides that, it may take several years before you are truly able to think of your friend in the platonic way you did before you slept with him or her.

  • Casual Sex Is never just Casual

One of many mistakes people make in a “FWB” situation is thinking that casual sex with a friend is no big deal. There are usually underlying feelings of attraction involved already when two friends decide to have sex. If one person likes the other more, it can cause embarrassment and hurt feelings.
The other problem is when you have sexual intercourse your body naturally releases hormones which are shown to increase feelings of love and attraction. In other words, if you’re trying to deny your feelings, you’re kidding yourself. Often a “friends with benefits” situation begins because singles simply get tired of waiting for the right person to come along. This is especially true if you have been single for a while, or if the rest of your social group is married. It can be difficult to have patience and trust that there is someone special out there for you. But trust me there is.

  • Having a Friends with benefits comes at the cost of that friendship

This is especially true if you’ve tried to stay pals. When you meet someone new, how will you feel about your friend then? Will you really want to continue to hang out with him or her once you’ve finally fallen for someone else for real? People that were close for years as friends find it slightly awkward to be around each other when they try to have relationships with other people. More than that, when you know you have someone you can always fall back into bed with, it makes it more difficult to truly let go when you meet someone new. You end up sabotaging a new relationship before it even begins.

Your Relationship Shouldn’t Exist if you have following issues

Is your relationship perfect? Nope, no one has a perfect relationship. However these following problems should not be one you have. If you’re in a relationship with the following issues than your relationship shouldn’t exist. Don’t ignore these or they will lead to your relationship downfall fast.

We are adults not kids
In a relationship you are two halves of a whole. Your relationship should not have parent and child feel to it. Your partner should trust who you choose to be friends with. That said you should be an adult and choose your friends wisely enough to know if that friendship will upset your partner. ie. Your ex should not be your best friend. Your partner should not tell you what you can’t do. They can however suggest alternatives and be supportive. At the end of the day it comes down to trust in yourself and your partner. Trust yourself to know what you are doing and trust that your partners motives are not selfish. That they are trying to help you and you should be doing the same.

Just because the fight ends does not mean we have a resolution
This is an issue I use deal with on a regular basis and it’s not easy to fix. You have a fight and someone says “I’m sorry” and reassure you with  “I love you” than keep it moving like nothing ever happened. Now for them it may be a trivial argument and they have moved on. Sometimes you do an action. You need to change that sometimes to everytime.The problem comes in when you’re moving on without discussion and agreement on a resolution. That only guarantees that what happened will happen again. In a relationship you have to willing to sit down and discuss what happened. What you think will always be different than what they think. Why did “it” happened? If you know the cause you may be able to better understand the root problem. You may be fighting about two different things altogether. Why did “it” bothered you? No one intends to hurt someone. Finally and most importantly both of you have to willing to say and mean “I will change my behavior so that it doesn’t happen again.”

Does the Golden Rule trump everything else?
Stop and be honest with yourself. Would your partner be willing to do everything you are willing to do for them? If you would cancel a trip with your friends because (S)he planned a surprise dinner for you, then (S)he should be willing to do the same.  If you (S)he would without notice fly out to see you, then you should be willing to do the same. This is the kind of stuff that defines the character of your relationship. As you grow old together it will become more serious. Will (S)he take care of you if you break a hip? If (S)he develops diabetes will you be there? If you two are unable or unwilling to do the little things now, how can you be expected to do them later when it really matters?

90% of your self is not enough
You should never feel you have to restrain yourself in a relationship. That partner next to you should be your best friend. You should be free to say anything on your mind. You should also not have anything hidden from them. It is better to upset your partner and talk it out than let them find out something later. Even if it something you feel is small. It will not feel small to them since you had to keep it from them. Likewise, You should be able to say “I love you” or “You upset me” without fearing you’ll scare your partner away. They should be happy you care enough to share how you feel with them. If at any point you have to monitor yourself in a loving relationship; newsflash you’re not in one.

Are you able to support without being supported?
If you really love someone then sometimes you have to be a crutch for them. We all do that if we love someone but can you do if you get very little in return. You can not plan for the unexpected. Things happen out the blue. There will come a time when your partner goes through something very difficult. They will pay very little attention to you and/or not be as fun anymore. Are you secure enough in your relationship to be able to love them without getting anything in return? If your answer is a no. Then your relationship shouldn’t exist.  Side note: Unless they are going through depression they should not continue to not be themselves after a while. How long is dependent on what they are going through.

Privacy vs. Curiosity? There is only one right choice
His phone rings, do you reach for it? Her phone gets a text message notification, do you look at it? I know you are curious but if your partner trust you enough to leave their personal property with you, don’t violate that trust. I was taught if you have suspicions that motivate you to snoop into your partner’s personal digital property that is just as bad as flipping through their personal diary. You should talk to them about how you feel. If you are not satisfied, feel they are not being honest and you are still suspicions. You should break up because if there is no trust your relationship shouldn’t exist.

I’m not him & You’re not her
Baggage is part of the deal when you date someone as an adult. They are single because they broke up with someone. They broke up because they felt wronged. The problem is when they treat you like the ex that hurt them. You should not be making your partner responsible for the sh*t of your past partner.

Your sucking the life blood out of me
Does the following sound like you? You zone out when you talk to your partner on the phone for more than 10 minutes. You often read their text hours later and sometimes don’t respond till hours after that. When they call you out on it you say you were busy. Funny thing is you were not too busy to post on Facebook, update Twitter or take new Instagram pictures. You hardly have the energy or will to find time to hang out with them. This is a problem. You shouldn’t have to find time to hang out with your partner. You should make time. Your relationship should not feel like it is sucking the life blood out of you. Your relationship should add value to the other relationships you already have with your family, work, friends and most importantly yourself. None of your relationships should be failing because of the other. If you find that being in a relationship is a full time job than your relationship shouldn’t exist. Side note: If you are in a long distance relationship, you have to find time time and plan ahead.

Stress at work: Don’t get the Blues

Do you sometimes feel like you’re not qualified for the job you were hired for? Like you’re an imposter at work? Slow down, many people feel the same way. It’s all in your head. You need a confidence boost. You already have the competence or they would not have hired you in the first place.

If you make a mistake it’s not the end of the world. If you don’t have the answer to the question that is alright. You don’t have to know all the answers. That said, you need to be smart enough to ask questions and humble enough to ask other people for help. You were hired for your strengths. You’re not expected to know everything because the rest can be learned on the job. You need to have confidence in yourself and trust the person who hired you made right choice. They thought you were the best among all other candidates. See failure as a starting point to final victory, not an end the game.

Keep track of your achievements on your mobile device via Evernote. That way you can always get a quick glance of your highlights if you need a moral boost. You should also create a support system at work. DO NOT mistake a support system for a click.

Clicks get into office politics and rumors. This is the last thing you want to get into. Try to avoid Mr. Or Mrs. It’s always Monday. Those are the people who always feel and act like its Monday even on a beautiful Friday. Seek out positive people in the office for your support system.

Can You Move Forward & Restore Trust After Being Cheated On?

Did you find out your partner has been doing there own thing? You are devastated, heart-broken and in disbelief. Dealing with the betrayal of someone cheating on you is no small task. It is not easy but it is definitely possible. Keep in mind that breaking up or divorce is not always the solution to the problem. You need to find out what has led to the infidelity in your relationship and get the help needed to recover from the trauma. Let’s look at some of the steps you can take to move beyond the act and get your relationship back on track.

1) Understand The Affair. One of the most important aspects on the healing journey is that you come to an understanding of the affair. A lot of times, the reason your partner betrayed you had nothing to do with you at all. It may have been his or her personal weakness that caused them to fall into temptation. This is not to say that you are perfect. There are always aspects of a relationship that can be improved or need to be worked on. It is important to know what exactly the root cause was so that you both can do whatever it takes to fix the problem.

2) Know That You Are Not Alone. Remember that you are not the only one that has experienced a betrayal before. Sadly, many relationships go through infidelity, especially these days with so many ways to reach out. Knowing you are not the only one may not really make you feel any better. However as time passes you will realize that it may be beneficial to talk to people that know what you have been through. Thankfully, there are plenty of support groups on Meetup filled with others who have walked in your shoes.

3) Get Help From A Professional. I can only recommend that you look for a professional that you can both work with to help recover from the affair and help you head down the right track with your relationship if you choose to remain in it. First of all, you will probably be extremely overwhelmed by everything you just found out. Maybe you do not even know what to think, where to start, what to do. A professional can walk along side you as a guide. They will be able to sort out and make sense of all those overwhelming feelings. Recovery comes step by step not leaps and bounds.

4) Understand That Healing Takes Time. Keep in mind that healing takes time. Even if you seek help from a professional, things will not automatically go back to normal. The first step is working toward forgiveness. This may be the most important and yet the hardest step of all. When you can think back of the betrayal and not associate any pain with it anymore you know you have come to a place of peace. Understand, though, that coming to peace with the betrayal does not mean that you have fixed your relationship. Your relationship still needs to be worked on to strengthen and to build hedges to protect it from any future dangers.

5) Share Your Story. What a great way to continue your healing in long-term recovery. You can share your story and help someone else when you are in a better place with all that has occurred in your marriage!

How To Keep Facebook, Twitter & Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship


Social media is great except for when it is not. You should never mix social media with your career or love life. Please read that again before you read the rest of this post. I’ll wait. I hate Facebook. It was the cause of one of my earlier breakups. I use Facebook for business reasons only. It’s a great outlet for marketing but if I could leave it forever I would. I’ve heard stories about people who have discovered that there long time partners were living completely different lives. There is a story of one guy setting his girlfriend’s house on fire because she changed her status from in a relationship to single. Its like the wild west on Facebook. From cheating to pining over a breakup that has moved on. It is a fact, its been said that Facebook has ruined more marriages and long-term relationships than in-laws.

Well I have a newsflash for you. Facebook didn’t do anything to those relationships. It was the user error not the product that had the issue. You were not showing your partner enough affection, so they found it somewhere else. The difference between her going to the bar and finding a hook up vs Facebook is that Facebook just made her work a lot easier. Ladies, the ratio of friends on you mans Facebook is something like 4 to 1 in favor of women. Guess what, he is a flirt. You knew he was a flirt before you got involved with him. Deal with it because it is not going to change now that he is on a social media site. I think some things can be shared online but not everything. For a healthy relationship you need to establish early on what you are willing to accept from your partner. The same applies to social media. You need to set boundaries about what is and is not acceptable online.

Risqué photos
Your partner is hot. Well to you anyway. We don’t need to see pictures of her in her bra or pictures of him with no shirt on. Think before you post any pictures of yourself or your partner. Some might take that picture as an invite to test the waters.

Fighting online.
It’s pretty silly to do this. It’s not only horrible for your relationship since everyone can give their opinion but it also shows the world just how childish you are. Sarcastic remarks back and forth on Twitter or multiple F bombs on Facebook are public. Other people see it. Would you go at it in the streets? If so, then you should not be reading this post because you lack brain cells. Keep your fights at home and off people’s timeline.

Stop with the tags
You may not mind if you are tagged in other people’s pictures. However your partner may not want to be tagged. Their idea of what is private may not be the same. We call have different levels of what we consider to be privacy. If you notice a trend where your partner lets everyone else tag them in pictures except you; that is a red flag. You need to have a conversation because someone is hiding something. You maybe the only one that is invested in that relationship.


Relationship Status Updates are the mother of all arguments.
Don’t let social media dictate your love life. Stop putting your status on your profile.  You don’t go around with a “I have a girlfriend” or “I have a boyfriend” T-Shirt on do you? People are going to know you are together, so don’t worry about it.  That said, if your partner insist that you change your status, give it thought. Do not just say no. It will lead to an argument.

My Password is your password
There should be privacy when it comes to passwords. Your commitment to your partner will determine if you share your social media  password. If you have nothing to hide, have at it but remember you reap what you sow. I caution giving it way though. Just because you are a model person now does not mean you were back in the day. Are you comfortable with your partner going over your old social media archives? That is not a conversation that can lead to too many positives. Until you are 100% sure of the character of the person you are with, I’d not do it. If you are engaged it is perfectly fine. They should know every single skeleton before taking that step with you.

Flirt is offensive
It is not cool to flirt with other people on Social Media. People will get the wrong idea and so will your partner. Even if they say they don’t mind or “It does not bother me.” What they really mean is, I wish I didn’t even have to ask you to stop. It’s just plain disrespectful. Would you openly flirt in front of your partner?

When it’s over, make sure it’s really over
(S)he broke your heart. I know it’s going to be hard to resist checking up on them to see what they are up to. Don’t do it! You have to unfriend and block your ex on Facebook and Twitter. You don’t need to read their tweets. In fact do the same thing on Instagram, Snapchat and any other social media you can think of that you both use.  Stalking them online is no better than stalking them outside from their house in the bushes.

Relationship TMI: Somethings Are Better Left Unsaid


I’m going to say this once and once only: The past is the past. Discretion is very important in the real world. Not everyone needs to know your every move and action. Take a step back from FourSquare, Twitter and Facebook. Social networking sites and relationships don’t mix well at all. If you are gullible enough to believe that your partner has no secretes, than you can stop reading now and head back to Neverland. Tell Tinkerbell I said hello.

As an adult you learn not to over share. You don’t announce to the room when you have to potty anymore. Guess what, women still do this and go in groups to the rest room. So it can be very challenging for them not to share everything and expect the same. Women think that talking it out is the best way to fix a problem which sometimes can lead to more problems. You might not like what you learn when you “get it all out there.”

Some things in relationships are better left unsaid. Relationship TMI just ends up hurting the relationship not helping it. Take note women: Not everything needs to be discussed, dissected and analyzed with a conversation.

That said, please understand that I am talking about TMI.That is not the same thing as deliberately lying by omission. If the perfect storm of you being out of town for work, over drinking at a lounge, your friends left you and someone of the opposite sex happens to miraculously show up to give you a ride to your hotel room; that needs to be shared ASAP. If the ex calls you out the blue for a memory lane conversation, you should share that too. Yes, that kind of information is going to lead to some uncomfortable interrogating questions and the BS Meter will be on. Just answer the questions honestly and completely. The last thing you want is for things to trickle out little by little because they will wonder what else are you keeping from them. As we all know mistrust and jealousy are the quickest way short of breaking up to end a relationship.

I’m all for honesty but somethings are none of my business. If fact, once you knows certain things about a person’s past you will not remember who they are in the present. The last thing you need in is a distracted person in a relationship. That’s when friends become the one that have more say in your relationship than you do. Here are some Relationship TMI women should avoid. This is just my short list. I am sure you have your own if you think about it.

You Kissed a Girl and you Liked it
Listen closely women; Do not let your partner know of the experimental experiences you had unless you’re ready to discuss it in detail and have a show & tell. You will have to be ready to have another go at it this time with him. If not, he will wonder why not him. Every man has that threesome fantasy. You letting us know that you have already been with a women means half the job of convincing you should be done. Be prepaid to get nagged often about this, more so close to our birthday, valentine’s and Christmas.

If you’re sexy and you know it clap your hands
Look, we know you’re hot. That’s part of the reason we are with you. No need to remind us each time by letting us know about each compliment you receive or that drink you scored at the bar with just a smile. If you are dating someone with trust issues then news of that free drink might end up costing a lot later on. It’s not that we don’t trust you. We just don’t trust any other male.

Case of the ex
Guys don’t care about who your ex was, what they liked, how they dressed, where you two went or what they hated. None of that. Bringing up an ex repeatedly makes you sound like you’re not over the relationship. Leave the past in the past.

What’s your number?
In the “What’s Your Number?” game there is never a winner. If you are unable to avoid playing, try your best to relate how you are not your number. A mature man will respect the fact that you’re an adult no matter how big or small it may be. Note that is of course within reason of whatever acceptable mark they have set in their mind. We all have a number that we consider too high.

The camera loves me.
It is all fun with videos and sexting until it all goes wrong. Not everyone can be trusted once they are no longer with you. I say leave the porn to the pros unless you’re prepared to get the TmZ treatment should the footage leaks.

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